It was an icy January August afternoon. 17° was the high of the day. I was in our home, warm and comfortable. I had no real agenda for the day, nothing terribly pressing, no requirements from anyone.
I was free.
I was free to cuddle with my little ones, free to talk leisurely with daughters who are quickly becoming young women, and free to be wowed over another impressive animation made by my 14 year old son.
We took a drive to the store, because we could. We stopped by the job site on the way to bring him the knit hat he’d forgotten that morning. Driving slowly down the long driveway I watched my husband. He was roofing a porch, in the snow, in extreme cold.
I held back tears as the reality of it hit me. He worked in the freezing weather. At times, he’s worked in extreme heat, rain, or freezing cold… for me. For us.
Me? I stay home. I’ve sometimes felt overwhelmed by dirty dishes. I’ve sometimes secretly complained of never-ending work. I’ve complained of work to be done for a husband that dearly loves me and goes out to work in frigid, biting temperatures to provide for his family, each and every day.
I despise the shallow feelings I’ve had, the selfishness.
“Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” Philippians 2:4
How Can We Complain?
How can I complain about working in the sanctuary of my home while he goes out early in the morning, until late at night, working among the ungodly? How can we wives not provide a clean, loving, joyful home for the ones who deserve it most, for the ones that fund our comfort? How can we not do this for our own husband?
“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Ephesians 5:33 (emphasis mine).
A husband shows his love as he goes out to provide the necessary income that pays for a home, clothing, food and modern comforts. We, in turn, can show our love by being diligent in teaching and training our children, keeping a tidy home, offering thought-out meals and patiently loving him when he returns to his sanctuary each evening.
“But someone will say, ‘You have faith and I have works.’ Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works.” James 2:18
How To Reverence Your Husband Through Homemaking
Now it’s time to get practical. And while this might sound cliché, meeting the most basic needs of a man is foundational in reverencing him and showing respect. Here are 7 specific ways to reverence your husband through homemaking:
1. A Clean Home
Most men want, (and should expect) a woman to be proficient in her duties as a wife. One of those duties as put forth in Proverbs 31, 1 Timothy 5 and Titus 2 is to manage a home well. This may require some education and perhaps some trial and error on the part of the wife, but it is necessary. The world may not value homemaking, but our LORD does, and so does a man.
2. Clean Clothes
This goes without saying, yet needs to be mentioned. Another way to reverence your husband is by keeping his clothes clean and put away. A hard working man should not, in general, have to dig through the dryer (or the hamper) to find socks for the day.
3. Meals He Enjoys
I want to draw your attention to the “enjoys” aspect of this next suggestion. My husband wants dinner ready when he gets home from work, yours may not. The point here is that we strive to prepare what he likes. Sometimes we try to help our husbands out by over-zealously encouraging healthy eating. While I believe it is important to share with our husbands what we’ve learned about proper nutrition, we must also remember we are speaking of grown men. If he requests donuts for breakfast, we shouldn’t “help” by serving bran muffins.
4. Bills Paid On Time
I can’t imagine the frustration a husband must feel when he hands a wife his paycheck, week after week, then incurs late fees because of her negligence. God forbid! If your husband trusts you with this job, and gives you the funds needed, do make sure to get the bills paid on time.
5. Wise and Careful Spending
This goes hand in hand with the last suggestion. Again, if your husband gives you complete control over the finances, be sure to reverence him in this way by not over spending. Keep a budget and stick to it. You can plan one with your husband so you both know where you’re at financially. Being careless in this way is hard on our guys.
6. Training Your Children
This falls to you if your husband works full time. A wife can become bitter by believing the training of the children is his job alone. This can and will create tension in the marriage and in the home. Be diligent in caring for your children, teach them to fear the LORD and train them in the way they should go.
7. His “Other” Needs
No list on how to reverence your husband would be complete without mentioning this. Simply put, one of the reasons for a man to marry is to fill his intimate needs. You are his desire, do not defraud him in this area. This is for the benefit of both husband and wife, and honors the LORD as well.
And there you have it. 7 ways to reference your husband in your homemaking. I’m sure we all have at least one area that we can improve in.