It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Last time I wrote here, life was normal, or at least the what.I’d.always.been.used.to.normal.
Today though, it’s different. It’s a new different, and I think I’m used to it for the most part. I’ll tell you about it in a minute, but first, I’m hesitant.
Hesitant to write. I wonder, is this where the LORD wants me? He knows I’ll drop this (blogging) in a moment if it’s not His will for me. So today I write. Tomorrow? No promises. This isn’t an “I’m back!” post, this is a “Good morning, I’m being cautious,” post.
The New Different
One random Sunday evening, early last Spring at my parents house for dinner, my mom looks up from her plate and asks, “So, do you ever think about moving?” Jason and I look at each other, pause, and I say, “Yes, we do sometimes. The girls are getting older (our oldest were 18 and 16 at the time) and we don’t see any marriage prospects here.”
That conversation alone has prompted us to sell 2 of our rental homes so far, and put the rest for sale, as well as our house and my parents. Yet, that day I didn’t realize all that would change in such a short amount of time.
Just several short weeks later our daughter graduated and we had a lovely homeschool graduation with some other families and a dance afterwards. At the English Country dance that night our oldest daughter met a young man who came from 3 hours away and who she would marry in less than a year.
Jump to February of this year and our daughter is engaged with a wedding date set for early May. Amidst the wedding planning fury, my dad suffered a massive “brain bleed,” underwent emergency surgery to remove the 4″ clot, spent three days on life support with significant damage to his brain, with it worsening each day, and passing on into eternity as my mom, husband and older children and I stood by holding his hand. My Dad (he and I below), he’s gone. I thought he’d be here at least another 15 years.
Fifteen days later my husband walked our beautiful daughter down the aisle to take the hand of a young man that I now call, “son.” He loves the LORD (just what we wanted in a suitor) and he adores that daughter of ours. And not just your, “he sure loves her” kind of adores, no it is an all encompassing kind of love and affection that warms a mother’s heart and gives a dad the reassurance that his little girl will be just fine with this new man in her life, leading and guiding her.
Three days after giving our daughter away, my mom, husband and the rest of the children and I packed up and headed to California for the burial for my dad. We said goodbye for a time. We watched as they lowered the casket into the ground, and I let a rose drop on top.
Grass grows there now, where only dirt had been the day we walked away from that cemetery. He’s been there that long. Long enough for me to realize it is real, yet still not long enough for me to be convinced of it. If that makes any sense.
So my plans for this space, this blog, are… well.. they aren’t my plans. They are His. I’ve got a lot to share, and hopefully at 43, even some of it will be wise (one can hope!). I even have a few projects I’ve been working on for the past several months, for you. Actually I created one for me, but you’ll find it incredibly helpful too, and it’s finally coming together.
For a long time, I wasn’t sure. But 2 days ago it seems as if the LORD looked down, and said, “Okay, you can have this now. It’s time.” I’m so thankful, and hopefully I can share all about it with you in a month or two.
Whew! That’s a lot of words for my first post after four months, but there was a lot to catch up on. I pray this finds you all well and thriving. Know the LORD, listen to His voice, follow the path of righteousness, walk in the Spirit and renew your minds. Live for Him daily and love Him with all your heart, mind and strength.
Until next time…
Oh, my heart goes out to you and your family in the loss of your father. I have tears reading your post. I don’t think there are any words, just that I am praying for you and are so glad you wrote today. I was just watching Homemaking 101 yesterday with my daughter for some motivation and I am so thankful for those DVDs as my mother worked six days a week while having five children. I never doubted her love for us, but yet I never saw her much or learned about homemaking. You have been SUCH a blessing to me! You’ll never know how much. I’ve decided to stay home with my family because of helpful Christian mothers and wives like yourself. With Christ, all things are possible 🙂 thank you for the reminder to always follow Him, no matter what. No matter where God leads you next, please know and remember that you have made a tremendous difference in my life and others… I am a better mother, wife, homemaker and Christian just by watching and learning from your example. Rest assured you have done so much for The Lord! Thank you always for all the encouragement… I will never forget it. I pray for God’s blessings for you and your family no matter what happens in the future.
Thank you for writing, I know I fail in so many ways, yet the LORD takes our small efforts and uses them. It’s to His credit that He can take us and create beauty. I am encouraged to hear that you’ve found the DVDs to be a blessing, they were always meant to teach homemaking skills and encourage the saints. The LORD is so good to bless the lives of His people!
I’m so glad to hear you are staying home to raise your children, you’ll never regret that decision!!
Bless you sister! <3
My condolences to you and your family. After losing both a father and a brother in the last 13 years I can say the losses made me stronger in Him. My life has more direction now.
Thank you Karen. It seems to have affected me the same way, hence the 5 month leave from blogging.
Brandi Watson says
I am so glad to see you back (even hesitantly). I agree with the others that your DVDs and blog have been a great encouragement to me in discouraging times. I hope you stick around and I look forward to these projects you are going to share. Big hugs! I was so sorry to hear about the loss of your daddy.
It’s a blessing to be here, Brandi! As long as the LORD allows, I’ll be writing and I’m sooo looking forward to sharing!! Thank you for your encouragement and condolences.
I am so glad to see you write again! I was just checking here hopeful that you would. There aren’t many people I find truly encouraging and life changing. BTW, we love your DVDs. My children and I get fueled up on them when I start losing focus and getting discouraged. I tell my husband that I don’t know many people who actually live the way you do, they way you believe, which is what we are like, even though we know many large homeschooling stay at home families. But there’s a difference. And I feel alone at times. So you come in and encourage and uplift me. You are a sister in Christ to me. The love and peace in your home is what keeps me going. I only wish I could actually talk with you.
Also, a teenage girl came over to my house to help me with my little ones, a girl from the youth group, and I played the 201 DVD and I didn’t know what she would think but she loved it! I was so encouraged, considering that all girls including our Pastor’s own daughter is talking about going away to college. I am concerned about these future generations and I want to provide the material to them for encouraging a Godly view on biblical womanhood.
Thank you for all of your efforts. I pray God will continue to strengthen you and encourage you too. God bless!
Thank you for your kind words, they are an encouragement 🙂
I’m glad to hear the DVDs are a blessing to you! We do have our chaotic days here too though, children who don’t want to obey, siblings who can’t seem to get along for a time… just like that passage in Ecclesiastes, we too experience what is common to man 😉
Your heart is in the right place, pray for those girls, it is a strong temptation! What else are girls to do? I too am concerned with how prevalent just sending kids away to college is, kids that belong to the LORD.
Have you seen the Monstrous Regiment of Women DVD? It’s very good at providing facts of the feminist agenda and why it is so destructive. I shared it with my mother/daughter Bible study once, years ago. (and it’s actually on sale this week! http://www.familyvisionfilms.com use code: women)
Thank you again for your encouragement, please do pray for us, we can do nothing without Him!
Yay! I am thrilled you’re writing again. As the other commenters have stated, you are a wonderful inspiration. Your humble spirit is beautiful! Thank you for producing the homemaking DVDs and for each post you write!
I am so sorry to hear about your father but rejoicing that he is home. What a bittersweet experience. Congratulations on the marriage of your daughter! I hope you will write about how you balanced wedding preparations with homemaking and all that goes with it.
Thank you 🙂 It’s very encouraging.
Write about wedding planning and homemaking? Eeek! LOL It was an experience, most definitely!! <3
Somehow I missed that you were back Jennifer. I am so glad to reconnect with your blog & your words of wisdom that encourage me so much. I am so very sorry about your Dad. May God continue to comfort you through this time of loss.
Congratulations to your daughter. What wonderful news!
I will endeavour to catch up on your posts as I have time. My hubby is away which gives me evenings to do that. But now I have to do some homeschool planning 🙂
Have a wonderful day
Thank you, the LORD is good. It has been almost 6 months, and it is still sinking in.
Our daughter is doing well and loving being married! <3
I hope the posts are encouragement to you.